“What do you know about what we do?” He narrows his gaze on me, and leans in close.
I inhale the strong scent of weed, and answer. “He said the guy he works for operates a home-kill-style butchery.”
Tigger raises both eyebrows, and snorts. “Home-kill butcher? Fuck, I’ve heard it all now.”
I stand, and glare down at the prick. “Clearly, I don’t get enlightened to the details of whatever you lot have going on, but you know what? I don’t care for it. I’ve never pushed him for it, he’s never told me. Why should that matter, Tigger? You tell me that.”
“Because sooner or later, if you stick around him you’ll wear the harsh reality of it. He ain’t gonna come home every night happy to see you; some days fuck with your head, and there isn’t a damn thing you can do to shake that shit. When he snaps, you better be ready, girl.” He nods toward Malice, who is now watching us with a frown. “You better ask your boy what this job of ours does to us before you learn the hard way.”
“Clearly, it has you pretty messed up, but that’s no reason to be an asshole to people who want to help.” I pick that moment to take my leave, and head out to the back patio.
The men’s voices murmur inside, but I focus on the chirrup of the crickets. Tigger’s warning grates at me. If I hadn’t seen that angry side of Malice the first week we were here, I wouldn’t know what he was talking about. But the comment about him snapping has itched a raw wound inside of me.
After all, wasn’t Dylan the same at first? All apologies, and regret?
The French door clicks open, and Malice steps out to join me.
Speak of the devil.
I watch him in silence while he closes the door, and walks toward me.
“Boys scare you off already?” he asks as he sits.
“Why did Tigger say I needed to ask you about your lifestyle? And why can’t he go see the GP about his issues?”
Malice stares at the ground, and I watch as his throat bobs several times. “I can’t tell you everything yet, Jane.”
Ire fuels my retaliation. “So, you can fuck me, but you can’t be honest with me? Jeez, I’m the winner in this situation, huh?”
“Jane, you know you mean a hell of a lot to me.”
“Funny way you have of showing it.” Being near him is driving me mad. “I can’t do this,” I say, and stand. “I can’t deal right now.”
I walk to head inside, but his hand catches my elbow, and spins me around. “I’m only trying to help you.”
“Helping me,” I seethe, “would be showing me you respect me enough to not purposefully lie to me.”
“I’ve never exactly lied about anything I’ve said.” He scowls.
“You’re lying by omission, and that’s equally as backhanded, Malice.” I yank my arm free, and storm inside.
The guys stop talking as I march through. I’m madder than a hornet. How fucking dare he think I’m too fragile to be honest with? I’ve bared my soul, my insecurities, and my weakest moments to him, and this is the thanks I get?
Maybe it’s me who should join a nunnery, because I sure as fuck know how to pick them.
“WHAT THE fuck did you say to her?”
Tigger smirks up at me. Wrong move, buddy. My fist connects with his nose.
“Hey,” Ty cries out as Bronx wrenches my hands behind my back.
I kick out, eager to cause more damage. “This fucker told my girl too much, too soon.”
Ty shifts his gaze to me while Tigger clutches at his bleeding nose. “Mate, perhaps you should ask yourself who’s the one who didn’t say enough.”
“What the fuck am I supposed to say, Ty? You know what we do.” I shrug free of Bronx’s hold. “How can I tell her that? How could she trust me after knowing that?”
“She’s a grown-up, Malice. She can work it out for herself.”
I snarl at the idiot. Can’t he see how broken she is? “You didn’t see what she came from, man. You didn’t see what he did to her. In her book, violence is not okay, at all, ever.”
“She came from it, Malice, but from what I can see, she was strong enough to overcome it.”
“He’s right,” Bronx adds. “She can decide for herself. You can’t referee what she gets to know.”
“Fuck you all,” I roar. “Fuck you guys. You’re supposed to have my back.”
“We do,” Tigger says from behind his hand. “We’re doing this because you’re too stubborn to see how much you’re about to fuck it up for yourself.”
I jab a finger in his direction. “You better watch yourself.”